Wales' favourite son Jack Rivers has returned to GOLFPUNK Towers to live the dream. To welcome back one of our finest workies we told him to get the brews on and do our work for us.


Jack 'Rapid Rise' Rivers. Today it's the teas, tomorrow the bins.

Look out for his Swing Hell... in the next issue of GP out soon. In the meantime he's banging on about a man who wears make up and likes golf.

The name Vincent Damon Furnier probably doesn’t probably doesn’t mean that much to the average golfer. Would you believe me if I told you that he is in fact up there with the Parneviks and Poulters as one of golf’s most colourful and interesting characters? Probably not, but then you probably didn’t know that in 1974, Vincent Damon Furnier changed his name to Alice Cooper.



As golfers, we should count our lucky stars to have players like Alice Cooper, Jodie Kidd and Bill Murray, all of whom show a genuine enthusiasm for playing the game and pushing it forward. We could have to deal with unfair infestation of z-list nobodies like poker has to.

Though Alice Cooper will be best remembered for his music and on-stage antics, the most intriguing aspect of his career is the story of how at a time when many people would have turned to the big man upstairs for salvation, Cooper chose golf. He made the right choice, and has secured a place in many a golf punk’s heart as a result.

If you find yourself looking for something a bit different to read in the upcoming months, let me point you in the direction of Cooper’s new offering: Golf Monster: My 12 Steps to Becoming a Golf Addict.

For more on this story click here

8/30/2007 12:18:17 PM (GMT Standard Time, UTC+00:00)    Comments [2] 

Good news club swingers good news. Golf guru Joe Hagan, the man who cured the Webitors incurable slice, has released his book. “Nail It with 3skills golf” is an impressive tome that is sure to benefit golfers of any ability.



At first we were a little annoyed that the secrets that had been divulged to us are going to be on the open market. We aren’t just being selfish but if everyone reads this book they’ll get better at golf, which means by comparison we appear worse at golf. Actually, that is a bit selfish.



We implore you to pick up a copy, available from Hersham Village Golf Club (01932 267666) or www.3skillsgolf.com.

You can also find out more by joining the 3skills group on facebook or check out My Swing Hell in GOLFPUNK31 out now.

Get involved.

8/29/2007 12:47:46 PM (GMT Standard Time, UTC+00:00)    Comments [0] 

Blog Master General James has been banging on about a couple of dustbin lids who are well good at golf. We reckon he's jealous and a little in awe. But mostly jealous.



Both balls flew true in the air, landed on the green and released like laser guided missiles towards the hole. It can’t happen, it won’t happen and yet it did happen.

Ulverston Golf Club juniors are in what some would call (including me) a bit of a purple patch. Still searching for my first hole-in-one this story does stick in the throat but after three in three weeks these juniors just can’t miss. However incredible that feat is, it is nothing compared to the fact that two of them were one after the other, in the same group, on the same day. And it doesn’t stop there.

Luke Allonby, 17, and James Taylor, 16, didn’t just get their aces on a poxy, wedge hole but a 188 yard monster that would challenge any golfer.

I just can’t help but feel a little sorry for them because they had to celebrate with a nice glass of coke. I’m sure they made up for it with that bottle of White Lightening down the park after though, or maybe even returned to the scene of their triumph under the cover of darkness. Either way guys keep going like that and this won’t be the only time your name is in lights.

"TWO Ulverston golfing partners landed consecutive aces on the same par three on the same day — but could only celebrate with a round of Coke.

Teenagers Luke Allonby and James Taylor were paired during the same competition at Ulverston Golf Club when the unthinkable happened.

The odds on playing partners managing successive holes in one are estimated at a staggering 17 million to one.

The two were playing in the junior medal competition, the Wilkinson Trophy.

Luke, 17, teed off first at the 14th hole, described as a difficult 188-yard par three.

His ball flew straight and true through the air, landed, rolled along the green and into the hole.

Then the unthinkable happened. Playing partner, James, 16, repeated the feat.

And there were plenty of witnesses."

For more on this story click here...

8/22/2007 10:47:45 AM (GMT Standard Time, UTC+00:00)    Comments [0] 

Kids huh? When most men of a certain age (and weight) we’re rejoicing in the refreshing words of JD our clean lunged, ultra fit workie James Farrelly had other ideas. Take It away Jimmy lad.



“I did better than most players last week who do work out,” Daly says after Tiger blamed the field’s lack of fitness for not being able to catch him in the USPGA.

In typical JD style he went on to elaborate saying, “fat boys like me can get through the heat,” adding, “I tried but every time I worked out I threw up and I thought to myself you can get drunk and throw up, so its just not for me.” Not exactly the role model we look for in our pro golfers but we don’t care big man, keep bringing colour to the old grey tour.

The one thing I do have to pull you up on though my swashbuckling friend is that Tiger only beats you on the greens. “I think the thing is that separates Tiger from everybody is that he makes more putts than we do,” says Daly.

And why is that? Because by the time he gets to the green he isn’t gasping for a fag and wondering if the caddy remembers how to get to the nearest Burger King.

For more on this story click here…

8/16/2007 10:00:20 AM (GMT Standard Time, UTC+00:00)    Comments [0] 

Our campaign to make golf the number one sport may just be working. World.com say that it was the No.1 Professional sport in the US during July.

” Historians will look back to July 2007 and reach a startling conclusion - golf is the greatest sport in the world. It reached that lofty height by default, of course, but there can no longer be any doubt - golf is king of all professional athletic endeavours.



Cycling, which has officially ceased being a sport and is now a pharmacy on wheels, took another hit as Tour de France leader Michael Rasmussen was tossed from his team and the race after violating Rabobank team rules. Rasmussen grows the growing list of cyclists who have at least been accused of using performance-enhancing drugs, a list that now includes everyone from Floyd Landis to Lance Armstrong to Robin Williams. But that's just cycling, and face it, it's a sport that committed seppeku about this time last year with Landis. But right now is about the most miserable time in professional sports history….”

For more on this story click here…

To join our campaign click here…

8/15/2007 11:53:21 PM (GMT Standard Time, UTC+00:00)    Comments [0] 

The Dimond geezer is back again, this talking about Tiger Woods and David Beckham.



In what must have been a fairly slow news day for members of the press at the USPGA the other day, headlines were made when Tiger Woods proclaimed that David Beckham probably had a higher global profile than he did.

"As far as world athletes, I don't see how Beckham didn't beat me. As far as global figures, he's probably more global than me.”

This whole debate arose from a programme the US broadcaster ESPN ran, called ‘Who’s Now’, in which 32 high profile athletes squared off in a series of knockout bouts to find the public’s most popular sports star. Tiger emerged with a comfortable final victory (winning 65.1% of the vote against Cleveland Brown’s basketball star LeBron James). David Beckham, meanwhile, had to put up with a narrow defeat to world renowned LaDainian Tomlinson (the San Diego Chargers Running Back, and 2006 NFL MVP).

Now, while the fact I felt the need to explain who Tomlinson actually is effectively demonstrates the narrow-mindedness of the poll (I mean, Austin Healey would probably beat him in a popularity AND most stupid name contest this side of the pond) it does raise an interesting debate. Tiger has consistently been voted the most high profile sportsman by the US media – and to do that in a predominantly US-sports market (i.e. baseball, basketball, American football…..WWE) is no mean feat. Yet, unless he is playing a clever media game, he does not believe that hype. As he puts it:

“You know, golf is not truly played all around the world. It is played in most places but not like soccer or football is”

He’s not wrong. Golf is not truly played around the world – hell, half the people I play with cheat! And while football might not be universally popular - it is after all the 27th most popular sport in America (narrowly behind dodgeball and hotdog-eating) - it does have a huge following pretty much everywhere else. It seems to me (as nothing more than a GP workie) that the best yardstick probably comes from their earnings. Becks has a far bigger take home pay (wages of $25m compared to Tigers $10m depending on season results) but it is sponsorship where the big bucks lie. Becks doubles up through sponsorship, but Tiger rakes in over $70m to emerge rich-torious. I would use this as conclusive evidence, but then again David Beckham did play at the FIFA World Cup (the world’s most watched sporting event) whereas Tiger gets a fraction of that audience for his annual Augusta jaunt. So, at the end of all that, I am going to bottle it, call it a draw and quickly hurry onto another topic…….



Away from the Billy Big-Timers arguing over who is more popular, there is an intriguing quandary gripping the working classes of golf. With the FedEx Cup heading towards the final stages (well, qualification for the last 144 players ends after the USPGA) attention is beginning to turn towards the hunt for overall victory – and the $10million prize that goes with it. Such a prize is unheard of in golf, and arguably still is as the sum will actually be paid as a supplement to the lucky players PGA pension (rather than the standard oversized cheque - though no doubt one will make an appearance). For the players this is no big deal, for the caddies it creates a delicate situation. With caddies generally earning 10% of all winnings, the lucky bagman will be in line for a $1m windfall. With no PGA pension, said person will be expecting to see that money, in full, soon after that drunken victory party has ended. But with the victorious player not seeing that money for between 20 and 50 years (depending on whether he is Vijay Singh or Tadd Fujikawa) it is unlikely they will be too keen to stump up $1m they don’t actually have. How will they resolve this problem? Who knows, but everyone will be watching with a great deal of interest (well, at least when they get their money they will, arf arf) Whatever the case, the champion golfer will have some issues to deal with, which rather reminds me of Puff Daddy, who infamously (and wisely) sang about ‘Mo Money, Mo Problems’. How true these words could be, and in the video it was at a golf tournament this fact was illustrated!!

Tournament Questioner: I guess this means more money, more problems for you?
Winning Golfer (Puff): Yeah, [sighs], yeah. Mo money, mo problems……

A modern day Nostradamus I tell you!

To read about ESPN’s ‘Who’s Now’ click here

For all you need to know about the FedEx Cup, click here

To watch Puff Daddy’s video for ‘Mo Money, Mo Problems’ click here

8/9/2007 4:12:54 PM (GMT Standard Time, UTC+00:00)    Comments [0] 

Bob Gillespe has penned a piece on Carolina Golf about the joys (and pain) of being a golfer over 50. It’s an interesting read even for whipper snappers like myself. So a bit of respect please and listen to what the old fellow has got to say.

”I still remember the phone call from my mother shortly after my 50th birthday. "How are you feeling about (turning 50)?" she asked. Fine, I told her. "Oh, good," she replied. "Your father went totally to pieces when he hit 50." Thanks for sharing that, Mom. Seriously, the best thing about hitting the big 5-0, at least for golfers, is that whole "mulligan" business. In professional golf, you turn 50 and you start playing the Champions Tour, against a crew of guys who now call you "junior." Most of the money won on the Champions Tour usually comes in the first three-to-five years after 50; then, unless your name is Hale Irwin, the descent starts, and it's not pretty. And there's really not an equivalent bonus when you hit 60; you're just getting old, pal….”


An Older Golfer
For more on this story click here….

8/5/2007 3:44:49 PM (GMT Standard Time, UTC+00:00)    Comments [0] 

Wonder workie Alex "Pat Sharp" Dimond has penned this blog because I had a headache.



Take it away Princess Di...

Here at GP Towers we are never ones to blow our own trumpet (well, not if someone else can do it for us) but with the dust settling on Padraig Harrington’s epic Open victory, now seems as good a time as any to proclaim that we knew it first. In an age when ‘The Sun’ brand their latest story on Carlos Tevez an ‘EXCLUSIVE!’ (even when everywhere from Sky Sports to the Independent has the story covered), we actually knew Paddy’s future before even he did.



Way back in GP11 (Sept 05), in an article generously entitled ‘The Grinder’, we announced that Harrington was ‘the man who took Tiger’s breath away at Sawgrass and will one day win a major’ – although for the sake of suspense we refrained from publishing the exact time and date of this success.



Aside from the golf, we had the scoop on Paddy’s private life, including facts about his Ipod (“it’s still in the box, can’t work it out”) and his leisure interests (“cinemas and restaurants, that’s my thing”). Unfortunately, with son Patrick only two at the time, there is no mention as to where the family ladybirds were kept.

Harrington is, of course, a famous teetotaller. Fans and media alike went into raptures when he admitted to a cheeky swig of a John Smith’s after that particularly arduous Sunday’s work - which he explained was down to a bet he had with his manager (and new found drinking buddy) Andrew ‘Chubby’ Chandler. Back in GP11, our intrepid reporter questioned Harrington on his activities after winning the ’02 Ryder Cup – where it appeared to all the world that he downed half a bottle of finest champagne:

http://delivery.viewimages.com/xv/71981688.jpg?v=1&c=ViewImages&k=2&d=17A4AD9FDB9CF193F669B259AB992A04CE02CA8B28D8C69D450D130E33168C39

“How do you explain the picture of you swigging from a bottle of champagne after the Ryder Cup win then?” “I was thirsty” came Paddy’s response. So it seems it is true what they say about the Irish needing any excuse to get the alcohol flowing. Lets hope we see Paddy plastered a few more times in his career…….



To get your mits on Golf Punk 18 and read the ‘Mystic Meg-esque’ article on Padraig Harrington, click here.

8/3/2007 3:40:01 PM (GMT Standard Time, UTC+00:00)    Comments [0] 

Calling all golf geeks, and there are enough of us about. We summon you to debate the use of gadgets in this tech heavy game of ours.

Golf gadgets have traditionally been the Chrimbo present of choice for anyone who has ever expressed an interest in the game. When a friend took up the game aged 28 he got nothing but golf tat for two years. If you go round to his house you still can’t move for putting machines and positive energy bracelets. In the end he had to tell his loved ones that enough is enough. Yet he still gets exploding golf balls every year from a zany uncle.

Not everyone is as ungrateful as this mystery friend whom we have to keep nameless for fear of antagonising his relatives. Acario Daire blogged an ode to gadgets that Matty, sorry I mean Mr Anonymous, hopes the rest of the Kennedy’s, oops we mean the rest of his family won’t read.


The greatest golf gadget since the ham and cheese putter

Take it away Acario….

” Golf gadgets are things are interest you and are useful while playing golf. You find them in many varieties and they surprise you by coming in various sizes like the stars in the sky. They are made to make the crazy game of golf more fun, a lot less strenuous and simply easier to play. They are made in all the crazy ways possible, using all the imagination and all the possible ideas they get. Unlike short-game training devices or swing aids they do not work directly on teaching you the proper techniques of the golf swing. They are excellent presents that are regularly gifted to each other on Christmas. No family goes without getting at least one gadget. They are also taken to be of traditional importance.

For most of the golfers after receiving the gifts, it becomes even more important for them to play well. The expectations that are on them become more heavy than usual, and they try much harder with more determination. Some might feel embarrassed to receive the golf gadgets, but some may think it is funny to receive a golf gadget which might help them in making their swing better. It is a known fact that gadget addicts go to any extent to buy the new gadgets that comes up. Some say gadgets help them improve their game and so buy the gadgets. But it is a fact that nothing can improve your play than a straight hard practice that nobody really wants to do let alone has time for.”

For more on this story click here…

7/17/2007 11:41:47 AM (GMT Standard Time, UTC+00:00)    Comments [0] 

Calling all golf widows.

US golf widows anyway. Good Morning America wants to hear from you. The long running morning news show is looking for the tales of those that are left behind for their weekend edition.


Heaver Castle Golf Course yesterday.

To get involved click here and fill in the form. and if they like your story the producers might get in touch.

7/10/2007 10:20:20 AM (GMT Standard Time, UTC+00:00)    Comments [0] 

So there you have it Welsh wizard Becky Brewerton carded a seven-under-par 209 to win the GOLFPUNK Ladies English Open by three shots, trousering 24,750 Euros in the proesses. This was Becky’s first victory on the Ladies European Tour after knocking on the door with 16 top ten finishes including four runner up spots in the last four years.


Next stop Sweden

A clearly emotional Becky said, “It means so much to me. I’ve been trying for so long. To finally do it is just unbelievable, unbelievable”, “I can’t believe it. I’m just in shock.”

So congratulations again Becky and here’s hoping this victory will boost you into the Solhiem Cup team. Roll on Sweden.

For a full round up of the leader board click here…
For more on the GOLFPUNK Ladies English Open click here….

7/8/2007 3:58:10 PM (GMT Standard Time, UTC+00:00)    Comments [0] 

There is an old sporting adage that goes, “If your good enough, your old enough." It’s usually applied to youth taking their chosen field by storm. Well every now and then there is a story that reminds all these protégés that they did not invent being good, sporting excellence has been around longer than 1985. In response to yesterdays blog about how ankle biters are taking over the golfing world. Here is a tale from Shaun McGuckian showing that the kids aren’t getting it all their own way.

Go on Shaun, drop some science (for our older readers that means please educate them).

"Press coverage of the ladies’ game is forever saturated by stories of talented youth: Kiran Matharu, Michelle Wie, Morgan Pressell and more recently, and ridiculously, the 12-year-old Maguire sisters.

But for all the column inches devoted to these talented young trailblazers, none could recall many stories of success.

But one lady who certainly can is senior citizen Arlene McKitrick. A Florida native and now well over 70 years of age, she has a whopping 136 amateur tournament victories to her name.


At least I get to choose when I go to bed.

Despite only taking up golf at the age of 30, Arlene won her first tournament in three years, and in a career which is still going strong 40 years later, has amassed 90 club and event championships, and a spectacular 46 consecutive senior wins.

Bookmakers wouldn’t be crazy enough to give you odds on an Arlene McKitrick victory.

Even chronic diabetes hasn’t stopped Arlene’s journey towards amateur immortality.
So when next you read of ‘the next big thing’ in the ladies’ game, spare a thought for the ladies of the game who go unsung. And for now join us in singing the praises of the incredible Arlene McKitrick.

For up to date information on what’s going on at the GOLFPUNK Ladies English Open click here…
Take advantage of our cracking 2 for 1 ticket offer by clicking here…

7/7/2007 3:50:15 PM (GMT Standard Time, UTC+00:00)    Comments [0] 

Ron Sirak posted an article highlighting the sheer number and undoubted talent of a new wave of dustbin lids in ladies golf. It is hard to ignore the shift in age from the competitors on the LPGA and LET. You know what they say, “If you don’t tidy your room there will be no driving range for a week young lady.” Well they should anyway.

“SOUTHERN PINES, N.C. -- Perhaps the oddest thing about Cristie Kerr's victory Sunday at the U.S. Women's Open was that at the age of 29 she was the second-oldest player to finish in the top-15 at the Pine Needles Lodge & Golf Club. And she earned that honor only by a year over 30-year-old Mi Hyun Kim. Clearly, women's golf is becoming like men's college basketball. All the best school-aged players are in the pros.


The final singles match putts out at the 2007 Solheim Cup

There were 11 college-aged players (22 or younger) among the top 21 on the final leaderboard, including 18-year-old Angela Park, who tied with Lorena Ochoa for second place, two strokes behind Kerr. In fact, half of the top six -- Angela Park, In-Bee Park and Jiyai Shin -- are 18, the age at which most incoming freshmen find themselves. But these three are professionals and have won a combined $505,152 at Pine Needles. Not a bad allowance.

And these were not flash-in-the-pan performances. Three of the top 12 on the Rolex Rankings -- No. 6 Morgan Pressel (19), No. 7 Paula Creamer (20) and No. 12 Brittany Lincicome (21) would each be in college if they were not good enough to play professional golf right now. Shin, 18, currently leads the Korean LPGA money list.

The youth wave in women's golf is clearly an international phenomenon.”

For more on this story click here…
For up to date information on what’s going on at the GOLFPUNK Ladies English Open click here…
Take advantage of our cracking 2 for 1 ticket offer by clicking here…

7/6/2007 3:38:15 PM (GMT Standard Time, UTC+00:00)    Comments [0] 

After angry young man Joel Tadman’s critique of Michelle Wie we have come across someone who is taking the opposite stance. We like to provide a balanced view at GP so have a read of Gene Wojciechowski views on our ‘Shell and make your own mind up. Again we’d love to hear your thoughts.

Stick it to them Gene….

”There's a reader who e-mails me every time Michelle Wie shoots 80-something, withdraws from a tournament, angers Dottie Pepper and her dog, or doesn't make the cut. He's not a complete nut job, but if I had to choose between his brain mass or the size of a Pro-V1, I'm taking the Titleist. This guy revels in Wie's failures and mocks anyone (hello) who thinks Wie has the talent to do a Tiger Woods on the LPGA Tour and one day qualify for a PGA Tour event.

I'm on the Wie golf cart. I've been there since the first time I saw her hit a tee shot during a pro-am at the Mercedes Championship at Kapalua's Plantation Course. She was 13, I think. You could hear the ball beg for an ice pack as it left the clubhead.


Joel stealing Michelle's chair just out of shot.

I'm on Wie's side of the ropes because I've seen her in social settings, surrounded by corporate types, media types, big-money types -- and she didn't WD there. Instead, she handled herself with grace, humor and a certain carefree, teenage goofiness.”

For more about this story click here…
To check out Joel’s original comments click here
For a profile of Michelle Wie click here…
For up to date information on what’s going on at the GOLFPUNK Ladies English Open click here…
Take advantage of our cracking 2 for 1 ticket offer by clicking here…

7/5/2007 3:34:19 PM (GMT Standard Time, UTC+00:00)    Comments [0] 

It’s here! The GOLFPUNK Ladies English Open starts tomorrow at Chart Hills Golf Course in Kent. Keep an eye out for Sophie Stubbs GP’s representative playing in her first tour event. However we don’t like to make things easy for our Sophie so we have teamed her up with Features Editor Shaun McGuckian to carry her bag and give yardage advice.

Unlucky.



Come down and see us and more importantly support the tour.

For up to date information on what’s going on at the GOLFPUNK Ladies English Open click here…
Take advantage of our cracking 2 for 1 ticket offer by clicking here…

7/4/2007 3:26:06 PM (GMT Standard Time, UTC+00:00)    Comments [0] 

“The lazy man is wiser in his own eyes than seven men who can answer sensibly.” Says the Bible, I am not sure where I think it’s near the back, couldn’t be bovved to go through the whole thing.

Rather than see this as an indictment we look at this proverb as a challenge. When I get seven or more men, women and children to answer sensibly allowing me to be lazy that would be beyond wise, I’d say it’s bleeding genius. So it’s with this in mind that we have decided to open up blogging duties to you, our beloved interactive user.

All successful blogs will be credited and anyone who shows proficiency could join the GP team on a more regular basis.

Follow the link to our Forum and find out more..

Forum Link...

Here's the first submitted by myspace pal and forum stalwart Cheffo, the only skinny chef you should ever trust. Take it away Cheffo…

German ban at golf club repealed

A rule banning Germans and Austrians from being allowed to play at a golf course near Bristol is to be repealed.

Filton Golf Club introduced the rule in 1919 after nine of its members died serving during the First World War.
The restriction had been long-forgotten until files were unearthed by a researcher trawling through the club's history archives. Club members have since unanimously backed a motion to rescind the rule at their annual general meeting.
The rules, drawn up in 1919, state: "No person of German or Austrian extraction, whether naturalised or not should be allowed in the clubhouse or on the course


We're not suprised he was not allowed to play, where's your collar?

Cheffo says,
"This is the strangest and most unreal ruling, maybe they were offended by the costume??? It's hardly P.U.N.K!!! No bratwurst or lederhosen in the locker-room gentlemen!!

Should golf clubs be so stuffy?? Tradition has its place and I respect the whole etiquette, but who thinks that maybe the whole thing needs a shake up or at least a spring clean???"

To read more on this story click here…

Does anybodies clubs/societies have any prehistoric rules?
Let us know in the comments section, on the forum
or click here…

Golf Punks
5/30/2007 12:17:31 PM (GMT Standard Time, UTC+00:00)    Comments [0] 

We make no secret of our love of stories showing people using golf to overcome adversity. With this in mind another uplifting tale has winged it’s way to GOLFPUNK Towers today.

Steve Evans got a twinge of jealousy when his pals were getting together for their fourballs. So he thought why not learn to play and he could get involved. So far nothing remarkable, that was the very reason I got into golf myself. However what does separate this story from most is that Steve is blind.

Steve Green the Club Pro at Bromley High Elms Golf Club had to adapt his teaching methods for Steve Evans demands, but by the sounds of things they have both learnt something from the experience.

Take it away…


To find out more about blind golfing in the UK click here…

5/29/2007 5:37:56 PM (GMT Standard Time, UTC+00:00)    Comments [0] 

It is that time of year again when the sun is starting to go through his hat collection, and all your hard-earned is jumping out of your pockets yearning to be spent on new gear. But you don’t want to rock up to the first tee after your once a year shopping spree and find the rest of your fourball decked out in exactly the same clobber. Unlikely I know, but hear me out.

You can massively reduce the chance of this happening by having a look at www.subseventy.co.uk and choosing your bespoke shirt/trouser combo.

As the self-proclaimed ‘best dressed man in golf,’ I have taken it upon myself to show you what you could have won. Don’t be put off by my selection, have a look and choose your own get up.







Jumble it all up and it could look a little something like this.


Now that's gangsta.

It looked better in my head anyway.

See you at the 19th.

5/25/2007 8:32:15 AM (GMT Standard Time, UTC+00:00)    Comments [0] 

Sony have decided to make the PSP relevant for all those out there who don’t see the point of playing Parappa the Rapper on the train.

The handheld gaming device has been fitted with a Global Positioning System Receiver so, if you buy the map add-ons, you will never get lost again.

Thankfully Sony have applied the technology to golf and created a virtual caddy application to give you precise distance readings to the pin and on course hazards. In addition there’s also a scratchpad to make notes on each hole for future reference.


The people at PSP have mapped out 31 courses so far. However, unless you are Japanese, there is a catch. All the courses currently available are in the Chiba area east of Tokyo. We assume when the technology is more widely available Sony will add more courses to the roster.

In the meantime either move to Chiba or wait patiently and watch this space.

To find out more about this story click here.

5/23/2007 12:32:24 PM (GMT Standard Time, UTC+00:00)    Comments [0] 

News has reached us from our spars at trendhunter.com of a new game gripping the waterways, Underwater Golf.

Anybody who has golfed in the UK should be familiar with the concept of playing soaked through. However our Chinese brethren have taken it one step further by hosting what’s believed to be world’s first underwater golf tournament. Five aqua-golfers (a word we made up just now) competed in a 50 ft tank for the honour of winning golf’s first underwater major.


Fibber told me he won this four years on the bounce.

A spokesman from Zuohai Aquarium explains, “The rules are pretty much the same as for regular golf. Whoever gets the ball in the hole first wins the match.”

However players were judged on how long it took them to complete the hole rather than the number of strokes taken.

The aquarium bloke went on to say, “The water makes the match very interesting. Not only fish and mammals distract the players, but their buoyancy makes it hard for them to stabilise themselves.” Water currents also make the trajectory of the ball hard to predict, he added. The winner sunk the ball in just one minute and 20 seconds, while the one who came last took five minutes.

For more on this nonsense click here…

5/21/2007 1:08:40 PM (GMT Standard Time, UTC+00:00)    Comments [0] 

Despite being old hat, this heart warming tale reached GolfPunk Towers via the gift of email this morning and it demands a wider audience. The names have been changed to protect the sniggling.

Take it away Sarge…

"This oriental man who spoke only broken English thought that his practice round badge allowed him to "play a practice round" at the Augusta National. The Grounds Maintenance guys in the background actually stopped and took the picture. As you can see I am struggling to restrain from laughing totally out loud. My partner, Sgt. Buck Logan, is not in the picture because he is actually just out of the left side of the frame rolling in the pine straw, from laughter. "



I really hope that was true.

5/14/2007 2:28:48 PM (GMT Standard Time, UTC+00:00)    Comments [0] 

This story came to us the other day and we felt everyone needs this in their lives. GolfPunk have a (morally acceptable) love of animals. As the photo below for our trip to Sweden will attest.


Paschal + Club + Heffer = Normal Saturday Night

So it fills us with joy to see we are not alone, the guys at Bulls Bay feel the same way.


"Call that a stroke saver? 150 yards my rump!"

I will let them explain.
"In a zany day at the Hootie at Bulls Bay Collegiate Invitational, unranked Central Florida and Florida State ran away from the field, while “Titleist” the Bull got loose and scampered around the course to the delight of the patrons..."
For more on this story click here.

5/10/2007 3:50:51 PM (GMT Standard Time, UTC+00:00)    Comments [0] 

With the woo haa that surrounded Justin Timberlake’s cheeky 18 at Carnoustie in mind, we at GolfPunk Towers were reminded of The Golf Album by Gary Farr and who out of golf’s growing legion of crooners could contribute to a sequel.

Don’t worry, we got over it.


J Tizzay has nothing to do with this album.

“The Golf Album was originally pressed and released on a cassette which explains the “Front Side” and “Back Side” titles. It was designed to get you to your golf course within 30 minutes (Front Side) and get you home or where ever you are heading after your round (local bar, girlfriends house, etc.) again in the 'back side' 30 minutes. The CD however is continuous play and if it takes you longer to get to a golf course, this is even better!”
For more on this story click here…

4/17/2007 7:37:25 PM (GMT Standard Time, UTC+00:00)    Comments [0]