Wednesday, February 08, 2006
Just one Cornwallo....

We've had an update from our legal eagle in Italy, Giles Cornwall. Giles has been working with GolfPunk since the beginning and is currently seeking his fortune in an Italian law firm. It's proving harder than he imagined. Take it away Giles....

"Am still in the office (yes I do work hard I know) so thought I'd update you all. I'm waiting for a lift to football after work. Have wheedled my way into the office 6 a side game every Tuesday, an exciting mix of flamboyant gesticulation, regular cigarette breaks and showboating thrown in for good measure.
The office atmosphere is a little bit edgy. Last Friday night, during a drunken party for one of the girls in the office, my supervisor revealed to me that she'd had a blazing argument with the boss that day. I had been present and just thought they were disagreeing over some contractual fine point, nodding sagely but having no idea what was going on, and that's the thing with language barriers, they're a bugger. A prime example came that night when I was chatting to one of the secretaries in my broken Italian when she asked me whether I had a girlfriend. I said no and joked that I need to find myself a nice Italian girl, to which she shot back at me something fast and Italian sounding. By her face I could tell she was asking me something that required a yes or no answer, and it was one of those 50/50 moments where you've just got to hope you get lucky. I nodded enthusiastically, "Si, assolutamente, si!", and she then gave me a weird look and wandered off. I may have unwittingly said "Yes, absolutely I think you should go on a crash diet and spend your life savings on cosmetic surgery, yes!" Decided to play it safe the rest of the night and just hung around the buffet table.
I went to nearby Verona at the weekend, a sophisticated, wonderfully romantic city full of history and an understated elegance. Where else can you get your picture taken cupping the breast of a bronze statue of Juliet while at the same time enjoying probably the best ice cream known to mankind? It was a vanilla-fudge and white chocolate double scoop combo for the record.
Giving her boob a quick squeeze is supposed to bring good luck or something like that. I've got to admit, I wasn't really listening as the significance of the act was explained to me as I was more concerned with keeping my ice cream intact whilst I copped a feel."

Stay tuned for further updates on 'Ignorant in Italy', available as and when we have access to them.

Il Signori

Golf Punks
2/8/2006 2:23:52 PM (GMT Standard Time, UTC+00:00)  #  Comments [0] 
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