Friday, May 19, 2006
The golf drill guru

The boys in the office have ventured out into the gale force winds for a game of post-production golf. Well, we never said we were geniuses.

Anyway, there's been a bit of rivalry in the office and a few egos have been puffed up and bets laid on the outcome of today's golf.

So, in order to cope with the unreasonable demands of British summertime the boys have been practising some drills they found on this great new site http://www.thegolfdrillguru.com/ all week.

There has been all manner of disco shapes thrown in the office and many resembling a circus act contortionist more than a golf swing, but that shouldn't be a reflection on some of the great advice that Duncan offers.

Check it out...


Tips and Swing thoughts
5/19/2006 12:50:56 PM (GMT Standard Time, UTC+00:00)  #  Comments [0] 
A new young star?

Just down the road from GP towers in Brighton, teenagers wipe mud on bus stops whilst sporting tartan caps and swigging the obligatory bottle of white cider. 13-year-old Ryan Simpson however is ready to out-drive and out-putt Tiger Woods in this year's U.S Open.

He is playing in the U.S Open qualifier at the Schuyler Meadows Country Club in Loudonville on Monday. If he qualifies Ryan gets the chance to go to the sectional qualifier in New Jersey next month.
I kind of thought it was a long shot," Simpson said. "I didn't really think they were serious because the U.S. Open is so prestigious. But when I saw the (Schuyler Meadows) course, it was only 6,800 yards or so, and I've played some courses that long, so I thought I might come over and try it."
Ryan took up golf when he was 18 months old, hitting balls in a horse pasture near his family's home in Burnt Hills. He has been playing since he was 18 months and practices 15 hours a week.
Ryan will use his father, Mark, a 44-year-old pilot, as his caddy in next month's qualifier.
"I'm looking forward to caddying for him," Mark Simpson said. "I asked him who he was going to take, and he said, 'I own you.' I've learned to stay out of his way. He's got a very good eye on the short game, so it's all natural feel."
Ryan who drives 250 yards plus remains calm about the qualifier:
"I feel confident that if I play my best and the course is in good enough conditions I can do well", said Ryan.
This year's U.S Open is being held at Winged Foot Golf Club in Mamaroneck, New York on June 15th through the 18th and young Ryan could be there so watch this space.

For Full story click here:

5/19/2006 12:32:57 PM (GMT Standard Time, UTC+00:00)  #  Comments [0] 
It makes me hopping mad

Humans are thought to have been killing kangaroos at a golf course on Melbourne's northern fringe.

Since January last year, the bodies of 22 young eastern grey kangaroos have been found at the Yarrambat Park Community Golf Course, most without heads. Another four bodies have been found in nearby suburbs. The RSPCA's inspectorate services manager, Greg Boland said it was hard not to suspect it was the work of humans. Many had been killed in the same way and in the same place. "If it was just the odd one or two you could probably put it down to animal attack, but when it's been so reasonably frequent, the circumstances are very suspicious," Greg said.
The attacks are being jointly investigated by the RSPCA, The Department of Sustainability and Environment, the local council and police, who say they have never known such a serious spate of attacks on kangaroos before.

For full story click here:

Golf News
5/19/2006 12:30:16 PM (GMT Standard Time, UTC+00:00)  #  Comments [0] 
Temperatures rise at Golf Course

Eruptions on course usually mean a temperamental shriek followed by a stream of expletives, but at Mount Merapi, Indonesia they can mean having to leg it faster than Thierry Henry whilst a river of lava flows straight at you.

The peak recently sputtered to life and activity has steadily increased. On Saturday, officials raised the alert status to the highest level, and more than 5,000 people were evacuated from their homes. Many are staying in temporary shelters close to the club.
Caddies that ply the 6,969-yard, par-72 course ran home when a particularly large eruption shook the mountain Monday. The club closed its gates, and most of its 250 staff were told not to come to work.
 “This is the risk of putting a club here,” Sukirman said. “When there is an eruption, it can make the future look pretty unclear.”
When dormant, the volcano that gives Golf Merapi club its name is its biggest draw. Golfers from around the world come for the experience of playing on the side of a still active volcano, the crater of which is just five miles from the course. “When it’s erupting I tell people, it is probably safer to stay at home,” said Sukirman.
The club is situated just outside the peak’s mandatory evacuation zone, and it is not the only business suffering because of Merapi’s wrath, which scientists say could last several weeks.
     Scores of guesthouses popular with adventure tourists are now off limits, as are campsites and restaurants catering to day-trippers from Yogyakarta, the nearest city to the volcano.
 
For full story click here:

Golf News
5/19/2006 12:29:03 PM (GMT Standard Time, UTC+00:00)  #  Comments [0] 
That's impressel!

Most students spend their spare time making tea, staggering whilst using traffic cones as makeshift hats, or god-forbid; studying. Morgan Pressel however earns $110,000 dollars playing golf, and is now due to graduate.

"I'll be very happy that I won't have to be under so much stress," said the 17-year-old LPGA pro from Boca Raton, Fla.
When Pressel walks across the stage Saturday to receive her diploma from Saint Andrew's School, she'll reach the end of a wearisome balancing act of golf and study.
A relieved Pressel said: "I knew I'd have to make up tests and write papers," she said, "but I didn't realize it would be quite this much."
As recently as last Thursday, Pressel packed in nearly four hours of study time before teeing off in the Michelob Ultra Open at Williamsburg, Va.
E-mail and the Internet have helped her submit assignments on time. Unlike most layabout students "She gets it done," said Dave Ahern, the school's athletic director and assistant golf coach. "If she's on the road, she makes sure it's handed in on time, whatever it might be."
With a heavy golfing schedule Pressel does stress over work: "I don't want to say anything has suffered, but it's very possible."

For full details click: here

Golf News
5/19/2006 12:24:08 PM (GMT Standard Time, UTC+00:00)  #  Comments [0] 

  Thursday, May 18, 2006
Doing what we do best: The English Ranter

Not that we are a cynical lot, or that we are all a little bit emotional after our last minute efforts to cram all of our most aspirational ideas into the latest issue, but we would like to say a big thank-you to The English Ranter for his wonderful website, www.englishranter.com

The English ranter has worked in the publishing trade for years and as such as a number of brilliant insights into the world of celebrity and un-returned phone calls.

Each week the 39-year-old self confessed gambling addicted, Marxist thief tells us what is wrong with the world and gives us salvation in knowing that we are not the worst people on the planet.

This week's English Ranter: www.englishranter.com
 
* The world's shittest sports mascot (and it's German)
* Meeting the cast of Beverly Hills 90210
* The mouth on a stick vs Paul McCartney
* The world's newest monkey
* A consumer's guide to getting cancer
* Plus Pete Doherty, paypal, water companies and other c***s.
* Loads of amazon adverts with things you won't want.
 
On this week's World Cup Ranter: www.worldcupranter.blogspot.com
 
* Who the f*ck is Fred?
* Thierry Henry - put your money where you mouth is
* England cheated to win in 1966
Plus some other stuff about teams in the world cup, and a load of amazon adverts with things you won't want.

For when golf isn't enough | Golf Punks | Your funnies
5/18/2006 4:32:17 PM (GMT Standard Time, UTC+00:00)  #  Comments [0] 
Unlucky...

     
Your funnies
5/18/2006 3:54:13 PM (GMT Standard Time, UTC+00:00)  #  Comments [0] 

  Friday, May 12, 2006
You couldn't make it up

For a Friday evening when the GolfPunk office can see no light at the end of the tunnel little stories like this help reaffirm that it is all worthwhile and that no matter how bad we feel there is always a bigger idiot out there.

 A Garrett Park man pleaded guilty to four counts of bank robbery Wednesday, telling police that he needed the money to play golf.

Thomas C. Springer, 57, of Garrett Park, appeared in U.S. District Court in Greenbelt following his arrest on Nov. 30 after robbing the Chevy Chase Bank in Kensington, according to a news release from U.S. Attorney Rod J. Rosenstein.

In a videotaped confession, Springer admitted to robbing seven banks and attempting to rob another between November 2004 and November 2005, Rosenstein said. In each robbery, Springer approached the teller window and passed a note that read, ‘‘Bank Robbery,” netting a total of $20,896. During the confession, Springer said he robbed the banks because he needed money for golf and was struggling to pay rent.

Link: http://www.gazette.net/stories/051106/montcou164503_31959.shtml


Golf News
5/12/2006 6:52:24 PM (GMT Standard Time, UTC+00:00)  #  Comments [0] 

  Thursday, May 11, 2006
Why Did The Duck Cross The Road?

Here at GP Towers we are in the throws of production week, again. As we have more than enough to do we have been following the progress of this family of suicidal ducks who were spotted crossing the A27 to Brighton. In part with concern, to an extent with morbid curiosity but mainly in empathy as we see this as an analogy for our own tortured lives.

We like to think of ourselves as a family, the road could represent the oft daunting highway to success and we are all quackers (Webitor – That’s the last time I'll warn you). Plus "King of Clubs" Dan Owen has got webbed feet, probably.

Here’s to us all flapping off to warmer climes this summer.


“What do you mean your not coming? Are you a chicken?” “No”

5/11/2006 10:34:37 PM (GMT Standard Time, UTC+00:00)  #  Comments [0] 

  Wednesday, May 10, 2006
Never a truer word spoken

'India', I was reliably informed by a property magnate, 'is golf's next big destination.'

One look at the size of his house and the quality of life he leads and I sunk all £15 I own into a savings account, which I hope will one day mature into enough money to buy a small plot of land. Doesn't help when one of India's biggest cricket stars goes saying things like this...

“No cricket please,” the warning tone’s calm, yet firm. “I’m here for golf, so I’ll talk only golf.”

You can’t take chances with Kapil Dev, can you? So, all those burn-out issues have to be consigned to the backburner for now. Till he wants them to come out, that is.  “I’m sure you don’t know much about golf,” he tries to cheer you up. “It’s a wonderful game, you know. It teaches you so many things in life…”

We know. Haven’t we heard it so many times? It’s a game for life, it teaches you honesty, integrity, punctuality, responsibility. But isn’t that the case with most games?

“That’s right,” he concurs. “But not all games can make such an impact on your life. It tests your patience, it tests your nerve, your mind’s always at work.”

Link: here


Golf News
5/10/2006 6:02:44 PM (GMT Standard Time, UTC+00:00)  #  Comments [0] 
Golf on drugs

The US PGA have rejected claims of drug abuse on the Tour and calls for a system of random drug testing to be put in place.

Documents from sports testing agencies have shown that, while no performance enhancing substances have been found, marujiana, cocaine and ectasy have been found in samples from Italian and French amateur and pro golfers.

The US PGA are basically giving this the two fingers and saying that these substances wouldn't help the performance of professional golfer and they firmly believe that the sport is clean.

They have a policy of self-policing, which they claim is working just fine, though Stewart Cink has said that random testing wouldn't be a bad idea if only to put to show that the Tour has nothing to hide.

To help encourage them we at GolfPunk Towers are going to start random-testing in the office. Though with the amount of Haribo consumed on a daily basis I doubt that the results will be anywhere near valid.

Link: here
Golf Punks
5/10/2006 5:48:16 PM (GMT Standard Time, UTC+00:00)  #  Comments [0] 

  Friday, May 05, 2006
GolfPunk world revolution begins!

We have had a baby!!! GolfPunk Germany hit the shelves last week to a great reception. Deputy Editor, Erik was with us at the London Golf Show and we were meant to get a load off GolfPunk Germany to show of at the stall, but some woman called Susie signed for them in the press room and we never saw hide nor hare of them.

Luckily, our clever German bretheren, sent a box of mags to Golfpunk Towers and we read it cover to cover this morning. (Well, at least had a damn good look through.)

This is just the start of GolfPunk's worldwide revolution. GolfPunk Italy is due to launch tomorrow at the Italian Open and a few of us are flying out to see it on the shelves and we are expecting GolfPunk Indonesia any day now.

Anyway, if you happen to be  wandering around the Naffi in Berlin or anywhere that sells magazine in Germany this is what you should be looking for...

                   
Golf Punks
5/5/2006 4:50:09 PM (GMT Standard Time, UTC+00:00)  #  Comments [0] 

  Thursday, May 04, 2006
Golf course dumbs down

I can't even be bothered to write an introduction to this breaking news.
We didn't know them, now they are the darlings of our lives blah, blah, blah

Celebrity Big Brother stars Preston and Chantelle are to marry at a golf club.

Ordinary Boys lead singer Preston, 24, and Chantelle, 22, will pay £3,000 to tie the knot at the upmarket Stock Brook Golf and Country Club in Essex in August.

The couple had been told the 200-acre estate and house was unavailable but have been slotted in following a cancellation.

They have reportedly hired a banqueting suite, garden room, patio and lawn which will hold up to 250 guests.

Preston, who recently sold his house in Cambridge Road, Hove, will give Chantelle his mother's wedding ring.


Golf News
5/4/2006 4:14:35 PM (GMT Standard Time, UTC+00:00)  #  Comments [0] 

  Wednesday, May 03, 2006
Earl Woods dies aged 74

Earl Woods has died today at the age of 74 at his home in Cypress, California, after a lengthy battle against cancer.

In a tribute to his father posted on his website, son Tiger said: “My dad was my best friend and greatest role model, and I will miss him deeply. I’m overwhelmed when I think of all of the great things he accomplished in his life. He was an amazing dad, coach, mentor, soldier, husband and friend. I wouldn’t be where I am today without him.”

Earl had been diagnosed with prostate cancer in 1998, but suffered a remission in 2004, which gradually worsened making him eventually unable to attend events.

Tiger announced last month that he was taking a break from golf to be with his father. His father’s illness had already caused him to from the Mercedes Championship at the beginning of the season and rush home before the recent Players Championship.

"Earl Woods will always be remembered for the tremendous way in which he and Tiger's mother, Kultida, provided Tiger with every opportunity to develop the physical and mental qualities that enabled Tiger to become the world's best golfer and an outstanding representative of the game and its values," PGA Tour Commissioner Tim Finchem said in a statement.

Lt Colonel Earl Dennison Woods was a retired Army sergeant, who served two terms in Vietnam and received a Vietnamese Silver star for acts of bravery, and was also famed for the dedication with which he helped guide his son to becoming the world’s number one golfer.

 
    Tiger and Earl Woods

Golf News
5/3/2006 7:40:56 PM (GMT Standard Time, UTC+00:00)  #  Comments [0] 
Tiredness kills, take a break

There's a picture of me on another golf website http://www.golfreporter.net.345 after I met Andre, the self titled 'rubbish golfer' at the London Golf Show.

He has been blogging his experience and has been very kind to the GolfPunk crew, except by publishing those pictures! I could o look more tired if I tried. If anyone wants me I will be in bed.




Webitor Shaun, the morning after his epic 19 round toe-to-toe with Mike Tyson.

Golf Punks | Your funnies
5/3/2006 6:41:50 PM (GMT Standard Time, UTC+00:00)  #  Comments [0] 
Buggy it!

Law is defined as the rules which govern our daily lives but can only be enforced if the will of people acquiese to it, so when your nation's law-makers start driving to work in a golf buggy because it's cheaper and more eco-friendly then I guess there's nothing left to do but phone buggies 'r' us....

Representative Todd Rutherford has found a way to fight higher gas prices.

The Columbia Democrat uses his new golf cart to go from his home to the State House, as well as his downtown office and courthouses. Rutherford says he bought the electric vehicle last fall when Hurricane Katrina sent gas prices to around $3 a gallon.

Rutherford says he spent an impatient winter waiting for the weather to get warm so he could drive the cart again.

The cart has a stereo and 15-inch flat screen TV, which Rutherford promises he watches only when it's parked.

State law allows residents to drive a golf cart on secondary roads within two miles of their home or office during daylight hours, as long as they obtain a $5 permit and insurance.

If you can't beat 'em, join 'em.


Golf News | Your funnies
5/3/2006 6:33:11 PM (GMT Standard Time, UTC+00:00)  #  Comments [0] 
The Funky Fundraiser

If anyone is at a loose end this Friday and driving around Kent then stop into the Royal Wells Hotel for what promises to be a cracking night out...



For when golf isn't enough
5/3/2006 6:07:56 PM (GMT Standard Time, UTC+00:00)  #  Comments [0] 


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