Tuesday, June 20, 2006

Reporting the news as it happens...

Hate to kick a guy when he's down, but everybody else is...



The Golf Reporter comes up trumps again.

Your funnies
6/20/2006 3:25:13 PM (GMT Standard Time, UTC+00:00)  #  Comments [0] 
British Amateur update

After day one of the British Amateur championships at Royal St Georges, GolfPunk diarist Ollie Fisher, has put himself in prime position with an accomplished 71 to back up his first round of 73, and leave him in third place in the clubhouse.

Irish youngster Rory McIIroy opened yesterday with a 78 and will have to put a good round in today if he's to make the cut.

After the second strokeplay round the top 64 players are entered into a matchplay and battle it out over the next few days to determine who will be 2006 British Amateur.


Golf News
6/20/2006 3:18:05 PM (GMT Standard Time, UTC+00:00)  #  Comments [0] 
How to win a major

While we were all perched on the edge of our sofas wondering what on earth Phil Mickelson was up to on Sunday, DJ Gallo had the inside scoop:

Posted 6/18/06, 2:52 PM ET
I'm about to head out to the first tee to begin my round. >Phil Mickelson

I'm feeling confident.
There are some good golfers on the leaderboard, but I don't think they're ready for this jelly.

Posted 3:15 PM ET
Saved par on the first hole, but I'm already feeling the heat -- it's in the 90s today. Most people don't realize how tiring it is to play in the final round of a major. There's three days of pressure built up on you and then, on a day like this, there's the heat, too. But what tires me out the most is pasting on a fake smile every time I stroll past the gallery. It's exhausting.









To read the hilarious insight to the whole final round click: here


Your funnies
6/20/2006 12:50:57 PM (GMT Standard Time, UTC+00:00)  #  Comments [0] 

  Monday, June 19, 2006

British Amateur Championships hots up

While millions around the world are still stood mouths agape at the flabbergasting end to the US Open yesterday, the golfing world has just shrugged its shoulders and licked its lips at the next titanic battle taking place this week between two teenagers in Kent.

Seventeen-year-old Irish protégé Rory McIIroy, and Essex wunderkind Ollie Fisher, 17, will both tee it up today in the British Amateur championship at Royal St Georges, and many would not be surprised if these two end up facing each other in the final.

Both teenagers enter the event on the back of some amazing form. Fisher, who became the youngest ever Walker Cup player last year, recently captured his first senior amateur title, winning the St Andrews Links trophy, Europe’s top amateur event, over the Old Course with a seven-under par total for four rounds.               

McIIroy responded in kind with a successful defence of the Irish Close title at the European Club last week to add to his second place in the Lytham Trophy and third place in the Irish Amateur so far this season.

Going into the championship, the youngster said: "I'm playing the best golf of my life."

It's the title that's really the most important thing and this for me is the big one this year. This the one I want to win most."

The GolfPunk office is just hoping that the pair can keep going on as if they both live up to their potential then European golf will only be the healthier for it.

You can keep up to date with their progress and the scores from the British Amateur by clicking on this link: here



Golf News | Golf Punks
6/19/2006 3:15:48 PM (GMT Standard Time, UTC+00:00)  #  Comments [0] 
Cats and Dogs

Shouldn't laugh....

A coyote has made its home on a Marco Island golf course and has recently killed a Marco couple’s cat. Now the couple says they want everyone to protect themselves.

The coyote killed Munchkin, Stephen and Dianna Purciello’s cat. The couple says they are not upset with the coyote. They say they are upset with the golf course's management for not telling them about the coyote until it was too late.

"She was my special baby," said Dianna. "No one even knew there was a coyote."

The couple says they never thought they would lose their favorite cat to a wild coyote.

But last week, a maintenance worker found Munchkin’s remains in the middle of the club golf course.

The Purciello's say they're upset because the Island Country Club Golf Course knew about the coyote as early as October but did little to protect residents and their pets.

"If there's a predator on the golf course, just alert people to that fact," said Stephen.

"I’m very sorry for the loss of their pet," said golf course superintendent Wayne Kappauf.

Now, course employees are hoping to catch the coyote by setting up traps around the course.

"He’s pretty sneaky because he's actually taking the bait out of the traps. He's pretty clever," said Kappauf.

Link: here



6/19/2006 1:34:38 PM (GMT Standard Time, UTC+00:00)  #  Comments [0] 
Golf for the family

As we dive straight into the pinnacle of the the golfing calendar it is a perfect time to show off the beauty of the game and encourage more people to get involved. With that in mind, it's great to see some golf courses proactively seeking out new blood...


Britain's first family-orientated golf course is to be officially unveiled.

Sport minister Patricia Ferguson MSP will be guest of honour at the Hermitage Family Golf Course in Edinburgh, which is specifically aimed at children, beginners and disabled people.

Lying on 14 acres of converted grazing land, it offers relaxed turn-up-and-play access, free club hire and no dress code on its fairways. The course's 12 holes range from 60 to 250 yards in length, and snake around a clubhouse.


Hopefully, everybody will get involved - let us know when the first family competition is.



6/19/2006 1:18:20 PM (GMT Standard Time, UTC+00:00)  #  Comments [0] 

  Friday, June 16, 2006

US Open blog

Quite a surprise, considering the austere front of the USGA, but they have a rather entertaining blog updating everyone on the real goings on at Winged Foot this week.

For example...Ever wonder what it means when the term 'technical difficulty' is used? Me too. I always pictured someone over the control panel either sleeping or frantically trying to clean up spilled coffee.

I bring this up because today, after our Webcast Live went on the air, silence soon greeted our audience. Suddenly the proverbial 'We're having technical difficulties' message went out. So what constituted this?

We're not ashamed to admit it, but a golf cart ran over the fiber optic cable that provided sound. The wire got entangled in the cart wheel, leaving Roger Twibell speechless.

No word whether the golf cart survived.

Link: here


Golf News
6/16/2006 12:45:37 PM (GMT Standard Time, UTC+00:00)  #  Comments [0] 
BE NICE TO MONTY

Golf Digest has begun an amnesty on America's hate obsession against Colin Montgomerie and has become amazingly popular. Funny that, as he's leading the US Open

The "Be Nice To Monty" campaign has so much momentum, it's a full-blown crusade.

A national golf magazine made and distributed the take-it-easy on Colin Montgomerie buttons for the 2002 U.S. Open just down the road at Bethpage Black.

The buttons were a call for golf fans to put an end to the full Monty treatment — namely, the American tradition of heckling and harassing a certain Scottish golfer who bears an uncanny and unfortunate resemblance to Mrs. Doubtfire.

If you'd like a deal on one of those buttons, get in touch with Montgomerie. He has them by the thousands.

"I don't know why they made so many," Montgomerie said, smiling.

For full details click here:


Your funnies
6/16/2006 10:37:27 AM (GMT Standard Time, UTC+00:00)  #  Comments [0] 
Soundbites

Well, it's the Friday of an extremely busy week. We are at the end of producing what we hope will be yet another award winning magazine, World Cup fever has firmly taken over and the live feed to matches on the BBC website http://news.bbc.co.uk/sport/default.stm has possibly become the greatest invention known to man since The Simpsons first aired.
From a golf perspective, the US Open, the year's second major has kicked off at Winged Foot golf club in New York and has created its own whirlwind of excitement. Tiger Woods is competing in his first event since the death of his father Earl, there's a 15-year-old, 4ft 11" boy who has made it through the qualifying to tee up in his first ever golf event and not to mention the sadistic layout that the USGA routinely set up to test the world's best players.

What we are most amused with amidst all this caper is some of the fantastic soundbites that have graced the air this week.

"Usually US Open greens are really quick," he said. "These are not. They're slow and bumpy. I didn't feel hardly any rust and if I had just made the adjustment on the greens faster I would not be so far behind the eight-ball."
Tiger Woods
Great Tiger, and again, in English?

"We are all aware of the lines and we all make mistakes."
Martin Jol during the Spain v Ukraine game.
N'er a truer word spoken Martin.

"That's rubbish"
Martin Jol during the Spain v Ukraine game
Sugar the pill why don't ya?

"If I'm sat on the bench, I'm sat on the bench. I've been on the bench in my career before."
A reflective Michael Owen






6/16/2006 10:10:20 AM (GMT Standard Time, UTC+00:00)  #  Comments [0] 

  Wednesday, June 14, 2006

Wales goes online

This blog is more of an inside joke than anything else but some of you might be able to sympathise.

I recently spent several days researching golf courses in Wales via the valuable mine of information that is the internet. I would, however, have had more luck using a yoghurt pot and a large peice of string.

Several (hundred) of Welsh golf clubs are a bit slow to embrace modern technology and advertise the wonder of their golf course to the world via the web and so it's great to see that the government is grabbing the bull by the horns. If only the bull had made it to the seminar....

GOLF clubs throughout Wales are being encouraged to make greater use of Information Communication Technology, as part of a drive by the Welsh Assembly Government to boost the economic benefits of the Ryder Cup 2010.

Representatives from clubs in North and mid Wales attended a seminar organised by WAG at Northop Golf Club, Flintshire, to learn more about the benefits of ICT in helping them attain a stronger business footing.

It was the first in a series of such events being held throughout Wales to help clubs boost their income and improve the management of their establishments.

Estimates suggest that golf-related tourism alone could rise by more than 40% as a result of the staging of the 2010 Ryder Cup in Wales, with an additional 30,000 visiting golfers attracted each year to Wales.


Golf News
6/14/2006 5:38:46 PM (GMT Standard Time, UTC+00:00)  #  Comments [0] 
Hear the one about the Catholic and the Christian...

Been away from my post for a couple of days, travelling up north on a spot of links golf duty, but on my travels I came across this amusing little story.

Two teams of North East clergymen are aiming for a 'holy-in-one' in a golf game across the Christian divide.
Five Roman Catholic priests led by Bishop Kevin Dunn of Hexham and Newcastle - are to line up against the Anglican Bishop of Durham, Tom Wright, and clergy from the Anglican dioceses of Newcastle and Durham at 11am the High Plains Golf Course, Bishop Auckland, on 19 June, in a Four Ball Better Ball competition.
Fr Mick Conaty, Parish priest of St Anthony of Padua, Newcastle, is captaining the Catholic team. He said: "I haven't picked the team yet. I don't know who the Anglicans are and what the strength of their team is, and I'm having a difficult time getting the information!"
This is the first time in the North East that teams of clergy of the two Christian churches have met on the golf course. The match came about when both Bishops found they were keen on golf. Catholic Bishop Dunn was vague about his actual handicap but reckoned he could 'get round in about 100.'
Fr Conaty added: "It's just fun and it's not meant to be taken seriously. It's our first get-together like this and it's a great idea. We are hoping we'll win, and if we don't we'll be sent to Coventry!"

God only knows who will win this one. Fair play though boys, may your putts be true and holey.

                   
Your funnies
6/14/2006 5:25:09 PM (GMT Standard Time, UTC+00:00)  #  Comments [0] 

  Friday, June 09, 2006

Minnie George - The Sequel

We have previously published a fantastic picture story from the talented (possibly warped) mind of Minnie George, daughter to our illustrious (possibly warped) deputy editor, Iestyn George.

The story proved so popular that...hang on that's not quite right. Minnie's angst and frustration grew to such a level that she felt compelled to produce a sequel to her epic first title 'How singers die'. Critics around the office are amazed by the innovative caricatures and inventive plot.

You know what they say about childlike innocence and honesty....


                      

                    
                                   Stage fright got the better of the Fab Four

                     
                         Tragically, Hillary Duff overdosed on cough syrup

                   
                    My personal favourite. Chico dying from over-exurberance to the
                         poignant phrase: "Oh God, you have done us some good."

                 
                             The Super Furries being super furry, and dead

For when golf isn't enough | Your funnies
6/9/2006 1:27:27 PM (GMT Standard Time, UTC+00:00)  #  Comments [0] 
They say that moving is one of the most stressful things you can do

This story has just appeared on the BBC website. I would've loved to been a fly on the wall during this conversation:

I mean what do you say to someone who has just asked you to literally shift earth? Montrose is also the fifth oldest golf course in the world, so could quite easily argue that it has been alright so far and wil take its chances, thank-you very much.

Bosses at one of Scotland's oldest golf courses have been asked to move it inland, due to costal erosion fears.

Angus councillors said part of Montrose Golf Course had to be realigned because of increased sand dune erosion.

Council officials warned the issue at Montrose beach was posing a public safety risk and that increasing tides would make the dunes more unstable.

Councillors also concluded that more research on how to tackle the erosion problem had to be undertaken.



                                                                         'left a bit'


Golf News | Your funnies
6/9/2006 1:04:21 PM (GMT Standard Time, UTC+00:00)  #  Comments [0] 

  Thursday, June 08, 2006

Unsure? Just ask Wayne Rooney

Those of you cocooned in some anti World Cup bubble may have missed the furore that has surrounded the 4cm of metatarsal in the left foot a 19-year-old scouse striker, Wayne Rooney.

If so, here's a brief update. In April, the poor fella was the victim of a late challenge and broke his foot. The country proceeded to plunge in apoplectic meltdown, claiming that his nimble feet were the only way that England were ever going to win this year's World Cup. Cue overblown newspaper headlines, bizarre websites devoted to healing processes and a four million per cent increase in the number of newborn children named Wayne.

The latest twist in this saga is that young Rooney actually might make the squad after all. In fact he told England manger Sven Goran-Erikksson today that he is "300% sure he will make it." So to join in all the fun here are a few other things that we are '300% sure' about:

The ham in my sandwich today was definitely from Wiltshire

Rubiks Cubes are hard

Red Bull gives you wings

'Celebrity' anything will always be shit

Seedless grapes are the future

Hayfever sucks

We all want to be in the pub right now


Your funnies
6/8/2006 12:42:34 AM (GMT Standard Time, UTC+00:00)  #  Comments [0] 

  Wednesday, June 07, 2006

Congrats to our GolfPunks

This has been a rather slack time for me on the blog of late, owing to an increasing number of days out of the office and working for the magazine (mainly golfing so I'm not complaining).

I haven't however turned my attention away fro the game at all and I would like to begin by extending our warmest congratulations to our resident 'GolfPunks Against the World', Paul Casey, Graeme McDowell and Graeme Storm, all of whom have qualified for the US Open at Winged Foot next week.

I managed to spend some time with Paul Casey a few weeks ago and he told me that his aim was to play well in Europe and try and force his way into the world top 50 and qualify automatically for the year's second major. He then went on to finish fifth, second and 11th, earning himself a tidy sum and bolstering his ranking from 56th to 42nd. So, congratulations on a job well done Paul, and with the way he's been swinging the club recently it would be no surprise if he finds himself in contention on the final day.

The big bonus for us was learning that both Graeme McDowell and Graeme Storm both qualified for the event by finishing tied second in the final qualifying event at Walton Heath golf club on Monday. The pair both shot two-under par totals afteer 36 holes to make the plane to the US next week. A special mention must go to the winner of the qualifer, Dutchman Martin Lafeber, who beat the rest of the field by eight shots, recording a ten-under-par total.

Across the pond the world's attention was focussed on Micheel Wie, who was making a lot of noise in the world's media once more by trying to qualify for a men's tournament, mind you not just any event, the men's event in America. She made it through the regional qualifying with grace and was putting in a bold performance in the final sectional qualifying, standing at two-under with just six holes to play. Unfortuately, the situation overcame her and she just missed out, allowing the can she/should she debate to rear its tiresome head again, but for a sixteen-year-old child competing at a level that is meant to be well beyond her, she did outstanding adn should be very proud.

In fact, I'm very excited about the whole women's game at the moment. While the domestic side of womens golf is apparentely taking a severe beating here in Britain, the professional game has never looked so healthy.

Annika Sorenstam and Ai Miyazato went toe-to-toe with some sparkling golf in the Shoprite LPGA classic, and Michelle Wie seems to be generating an enormous amount of publicity for the game. The wealth of talent runs through all the different generations on Tour, and there is a lot that could be learned by watching the way these girls make their way around a golf course. Good Work Ladies, keep it up. We'll be watching this week with a keen interest.



6/7/2006 10:59:35 PM (GMT Standard Time, UTC+00:00)  #  Comments [0] 

  Tuesday, June 06, 2006

Define Idiocy

And to cultivate my new found hatred, I started roaming the net trying to figure out why anyone who be so pointlessly moronic as to devote their life to a task as inane as spamming and I couldn't work it out for the life of me, until....

A group of would-be thieves were tripped up going back for a second load of alcohol from the Skyline Golf Club in Beaver Creek Township, the Crawford County Sheriff's Department said.

The owner of Skyline Golf Club, Gerald Balmes, interrupted the break-in shortly after 2 a.m. Friday when he found a vehicle sitting outside of the clubhouse, Sheriff Kirk Wakefield said in a release. The vehicle sped off and Balmes attempted to follow. The driver of the suspect vehicle, identified as a 21-year-old Grayling woman, lost control at the intersection of Five Mile Road and Old 27 South and hit a billboard. The occupants then fled on foot.

Deputies discovered several cases of beer and bottles of liquor inside the car. When they returned to the golf club, they discovered numerous cases of liquor stacked for removal by the side door.

The driver plus a 22-year-old female and four males ages 15, 17, 19 and 20 were arrested and all but the 15-year-old were lodged in the Crawford County Jail. All are from the Grayling area. Names of the suspects are being withheld pending arraignment.

'Would-be' is even a fraction generous, I think.


Your funnies
6/6/2006 10:00:04 PM (GMT Standard Time, UTC+00:00)  #  Comments [0] 
Thanks

Firstly, I'd just like to say a big thank-you to everyone who rallied to get our blogroll up and going again. A special thanks to those who immediately sent in our google cache.

If you have been left off then apologies, please get in touch and we will rectify this. I have to say that this has given me a new found enthusiam for blogging and a new pet hate - spammers- which I seem to share with a number of others, so in every raincloud is a silver-lining I guess.


Golf Punks
6/6/2006 9:42:51 PM (GMT Standard Time, UTC+00:00)  #  Comments [0]